A Housewifely Rant

A Housewifely Rant.
To the manufacturers of cleaning products: Please change the design of your bottles.

It seems that cleaning product bottles are shaped on purpose to fall over continuously when approaching a quarter full. Not only are the bottoms of these bottles subtly shaped to curve inwards, they also have an indented middle, thus leaving only a ridge to stand on.

May I (rather impolitely) suggest: V Shaped Bottles! Inverted, of course…

An inverted v-shaped bottle will not only NOT fall over, but will also pack well, i.e. tessellate wonderfully. Happy Housewife = Happy Hypermarket. Everybody wins.
I am now on the hunt for cleaning products whose bottles are shaped so they will not fall over when approaching empty. Any suggestions?

To the manufacturers of dishwashers: Please make sure your machines actually clean.

I have a brand new dishwasher (whose brand shall remain bland) that only cleans when the dishes are already clean. If I put something dirty in (heaven forfend), it comes out…wait for it…dirty! It would seem that this particular labour saving device does not work. I must rinse, scrub, and then load; then I must empty and dry the dishes afterwards. Hm. Not so much labour saving as labour intensifying. Is this a conspiracy? Let’s fool the housewives? (cue evil chuckle)


To the manufacturers of fridge-freezers: Please re-engineer them.

I am referring to the silly European design of having a small freezer box on top of a small fridge, not large American sized fridge-freezers. (Which are wonderful, I had one and miss it every day.)
I have a brand new in-built fridge-freezer that is economical! How wonderful, I thought, how clever, to bring freezing air down from the freezer into the fridge, thereby cooling without using extra energy! So now, of course, I have one and a half freezers. Everything I place towards the back of my fridge freezes! Amazing! And it doesn’t bother me in the slightest that I must take out my vegetable box every day and wipe out the damp and place it the other way around to avoid freezing. Noooo, not at all. It doesn’t bother me in the slightest that this paragon of modern design and economy ices up – both in the freezer and at the back of the fridge. Nope. It doesn’t bother me in the slightest, this penchant for small fridges that are suitable for a family of one, not four. Nope. Not. At. All.


And now may I say ‘Thank You’ to Mr Dyson who invented a hoover (sorry, vacuum cleaner) that actually works! I have had mine for five years and it has never given me a problem. It still sucks powerfully and doesn’t complain when marbles get stuck in its pipes. Yes it’s noisy, yes it’s a little on the heavy side, but it works. Happy Hoovering Housewife Here.


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